“First you learn the steps. Then you start dancing with the client.โ
Most creative practices follow the same arc: you start with technique, then move into freedom. Music, painting, performance, therapyโitโs all the same. Mastery comes when form gives way to flow.
EMDR is no different.
At first, the therapist follows the manual. The standard protocol. The โhereโs how we do it.โ This is essentialโclients need that containment. But within that structure, something else wants to emerge:
Improvisation.
Consider the world of dance performance. Dancers may train for months with choreography structured “by the numbers”โevery movement timed and sequenced. But once on stage, anything can happen: a slip, a missed cue, a spontaneous choice. In that moment, what matters most is Presence. If the dancer gets caught up in having made a โmistakeโ, they lose the ability to respond in real time. They freeze. But if they stay open, the “mistake” becomes a new proposal. A fresh momentโsomething raw, something true.ย ย
The same happens in therapy. Just like a performer learns to stay open and respond to whatโs unfolding in real time, so do we. Weโre reading the clientโs voice, face, body, tone. Weโre sensing when to pause, when to deepen, when to back off. Itโs not guessworkโitโs attunement.
And sometimes we might not get every word right. We might miss a cue. We might overstep or underreach. But if we remain Presentโif we stay attunedโwe can move with what unfolds. And the client stays with us. When that happens, the session doesnโt just feel correctโit feels honest.
As therapists, we need to give ourselves permission to get it wrong. Not carelesslyโbut consciously. As long as we understand whatโs happening and remain engaged, each moment becomes an opportunity to reconnect, revise, and move forward.
That kind of authenticity canโt be scripted. It has to be felt. And it comes from showing up, testing, and adjustingโover and overโuntil our inner compass learns to lead.
When we trust that process, the client does too. Together, we move.
~ Jordan Shafer/nmm
Amanda Martin holds a PhD in Family Therapy and is a Licensed Professional Counselor, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist Supervisor, and EMDRIA Approved Consultant. With over 14 years of experience, she specializes in trauma therapy for individuals and families in residential and outpatient settings. Amanda also provides supervision for EMDR certification, EMDR consultants-in-training, and LMFT-Associates. Her mission is to help people find a healthy, joyful, and fulfilling path in life. Her warm, supportive, and interactive counseling style incorporates Symbolic Experiential Therapy, Trauma-Focused Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, EMDR, HeartMath, Animal-Assisted Therapy, Neurofeedback, and Collaborative Problem Solving.
Dr. Jose Carbajal, a U.S. Army veteran, earned his bachelorโs and masterโs degrees in social work and a masterโs in theological studies from Baylor University, and a Ph.D. in Social Work from the University of Texas at Arlington. With over 15 years of clinical experience and extensive teaching experience, Jose specializes in trauma, sexual abuse recovery, domestic violence, and substance abuse. His research focuses on trauma interventions, neuroscience, and faith. He is EMDR Certified, an Approved Consultant, and an EMDRIA Approved Trainer, with numerous publications and professional presentations to his name.
Amber holds a PhD in Counselor Education and Supervision from Regent University. She is a Licensed Professional Counselor in both Texas and Oklahoma and holds Supervisor credential for Texas. Amber is an EMDRIA consultant and trainer. She has over a decade of experience in the trauma field in work with uniformed services, domestic violence, childhood trauma and abuse, and recent mass trauma events. Amber provides consultation for EMDRIA certification, for consultants-in-training, and supervision for LPC-Associates. Amber continues to research the benefits of EMDR therapy with a variety of populations. Her goal is to help build strong clinicians who are well versed in trauma interventions to better support their clients. Amber sees a limited number of clients with a focus on trauma work, she is also a Certified Career Counselor and Certified through EAGALA to provide equine-assisted therapy.ย
Amber holds a PhD in Counselor Education and Supervision from Regent University. She is a Licensed Professional Counselor in both Texas and Oklahoma and holds Supervisor credential for Texas. Amber is an EMDRIA consultant and trainer. She has over a decade of experience in the trauma field in work with uniformed services, domestic violence, childhood trauma and abuse, and recent mass trauma events. Amber provides consultation for EMDRIA certification, for consultants-in-training, and supervision for LPC-Associates. Amber continues to research the benefits of EMDR therapy with a variety of populations. Her goal is to help build strong clinicians who are well versed in trauma interventions to better support their clients. Amber sees a limited number of clients with a focus on trauma work, she is also a Certified Career Counselor and Certified through EAGALA to provide equine-assisted therapy.ย
Dr. Jose Carbajal, a U.S. Army veteran, earned his bachelorโs and masterโs degrees in social work and a masterโs in theological studies from Baylor University, and a Ph.D. in Social Work from the University of Texas at Arlington. With over 15 years of clinical experience and extensive teaching experience, Jose specializes in trauma, sexual abuse recovery, domestic violence, and substance abuse. His research focuses on trauma interventions, neuroscience, and faith. He is EMDR Certified, an Approved Consultant, and an EMDRIA Approved Trainer, with numerous publications and professional presentations to his name.
Amanda Martin holds a PhD in Family Therapy and is a Licensed Professional Counselor, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist Supervisor, and EMDRIA Approved Consultant. With over 14 years of experience, she specializes in trauma therapy for individuals and families in residential and outpatient settings. Amanda also provides supervision for EMDR certification, EMDR consultants-in-training, and LMFT-Associates. Her mission is to help people find a healthy, joyful, and fulfilling path in life. Her warm, supportive, and interactive counseling style incorporates Symbolic Experiential Therapy, Trauma-Focused Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, EMDR, HeartMath, Animal-Assisted Therapy, Neurofeedback, and Collaborative Problem Solving.
