Resolving Emotions – Michael Brown

loosely scripted from Michael Brown’s youtube one-on-one-session vids

INTRO

You can do this anywhere anytime
Keep your eyes open

Bring to mind the last time you got upset
Noticed there are 3 things going on simultaneously:
1. The physical circumstances in which this upset occurred
2. The story you told yourself the moment you got upset
3. The feeling underlying your story ( i.e. FEAR, ANGER, GRIEF, or a mixture of these)

Remember that moment of upset and bring to mind that FEELING
Notice that feeling
Recall that feeling

Now that you remember that FEELING
Where do you feel that feeling in your body now?
Whether you call the feeling fear, anger, or grief, somewhere in your body, you will feel that feeling
Allow yourself to feel that feeling now

WATCH THAT FEELING AND LISTEN TO IT

As you feel this feeling, watch it the same way you’d want a bird in a tree (when you’re watching a bird in a tree, you’re not trying to make the bird do anything, you’re just observing the bird in the tree; you are placing no conditions on the bird; you allow the bird to be and simply watch it.). Your eyes are open so you notice that you can watch with your awareness; this has nothing to do with your physical eyes; watch it with the eyes of your awareness; really what you are watching it with is your FELT PERCEPTION

Allow yourself to watch that feeling for awhile; just be with it and allow it to be
Watch it in the same way you listen to a song; you are listening to that feeling with your attention; when we’re listening to a song on the radio, we’re not trying to change the song, we are simply receiving that music; we are receiving the feeling of that song; we receive it we do not try to alter or change it; it’s the same with this feeling; listen to this feeling.

Notice as you listen to or watch that feeling, the mental body asks questions; it may say “what’s the purpose of this; what’s supposed to happen; how long will it take?”
Allow it to ask it’s questions and do what it wants to do. Our task is to simply watch that feeling and listen to it without any conditions placed upon it

Now bring to mind one of your parents who you have a relationship with that feels less then peaceful and brings you either feelings of fear, anger, or grief…
listen to and watch the feeling that comes up
See where it is in your body
watch it
listen to it
We are not trying to accomplish anything in this task; we are simply noticing the feeling that comes up, identifying where it is in the body, allowing it to be there and allowing ourselves to be with it.

Now cast your gaze upon your life and look for an event in your life that you regard as being Tramatic; an event that you know is unresolved to this day
Take a look at that event and see 1) The physical circumstance of it; 2) The story you have told yourself; 3) The underlying feeling (EMOTIONAL SIGNATURE); and 4) The physical feeling in your body when you allow that emotional signature to enter your memory
Allow yourself to feel that trauma that was unresolved
Allow yourself to feel it
Where is it in your body
Allow yourself to be with it
Allow it to be there
Watch it and listen to it without placing any conditions upon it

With this exercise we notice:
1. The physical circumstances in which this upset occurred
2. The story you told yourself the moment you got upset
3. The feeling underlying your story ( i.e. FEAR, ANGER, GRIEF, or a mixture of these)
All have emotional signatures
These emotional signatures can be found through physical sensations that they also bring up in the body when we bring them into our memory
We can think of these as notes in a melody that 1) we don’t like to listen to and 2) correspond to physical places in our body; when we bring those notes up we feel those places in our body come to our awareness; what we may not realize is that tune with those notes is played all the time and our body feels those energetic situations or discomforts 24hr a day.
When we are in the mental aspect of our life; when we are busy with lots of physical activity; we suppress and sedate our awareness of those notes/emotional signatures and so we don’t feel the impact it’s having on our body.
However, because that is going on in our body all the time, we have behaviors in our life based on trying to feel better; these behaviors are what we can call “doings”; things that we do in our life that come out of an attempt to sedate and control our awareness of this discomfort that’s going on in our body all the time

The way we address this particular Melody is:
Over the next day or two make a list
Gaze over your life
Look at the people that irritate you most; The people in your family that you’re not at peace with, that cause upset whenever you are around them, that caused you to feel uncomfortable
Look at the circumstances in your life right now what are causing you anxiety
Look at your past unresolved experiences that were traumatic to you, that caused you either anger, grief, or fear
Make a list of 10 different items
Number them 1 to 10
In front of each number write one word (i.e. 1. Sister 2. Bus. 3. Accident. 4. Illness . . .)
We don’t want more than one word because we don’t want to engage in the story; all we want to do is write one word that will quickly remind us of the event, circumstance, person, or situation that is causing us fear anger grief or which we have fear anger or grief attached to.
Once this list is made, next aspect is consistency.
Consistency is very important in this procedure.
Every day for no more than 15 minutes (we don’t want more than 15 minutes a day because then it becomes a big effort and a doing). We want to show effortlessness; 15 minutes in a day is nothing; 15 minutes out of 24 hours is nothing
CONSISTENTLY For 15 minutes every day we are going to take out our list and Scan over it and what you will notice is that one or two of those titles you have written out Will stand out in your attention and this is because the notes/emotional signatures are closest to The surface
Pick one
Remind yourself, this is related to ___; start to tell your story until you can feel the anger fear or grief or emotional resonance even if you can’t name it doesn’t matter; just want to be able to feel the emotional signature related to that and where you feel in your body.
Then apply the listening and watching; sit with that emotional signature; B with it, and simply allow it to be there; don’t place any conditions on it
Sometimes the signature will ._______ , and sometimes it will disappear
If it disappears we look at our list for another emotional signature and sit with that one
If the emotional signature can stay with us for 15 minutes, we allow it to be there for 15 minutes
We do this procedure for 15 minutes and it must be done every single day CONSISTENTLY

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Dr. Amber Quaranta-Leech, LPC-S

Amber holds a PhD in Counselor Education and Supervision from Regent University. She is a Licensed Professional Counselor in both Texas and Oklahoma and holds Supervisor credential for Texas. Amber is an EMDRIA consultant and trainer. She has over a decade of experience in the trauma field in work with uniformed services, domestic violence, childhood trauma and abuse, and recent mass trauma events. Amber provides consultation for EMDRIA certification, for consultants-in-training, and supervision for LPC-Associates. Amber continues to research the benefits of EMDR therapy with a variety of populations. Her goal is to help build strong clinicians who are well versed in trauma interventions to better support their clients. Amber sees a limited number of clients with a focus on trauma work, she is also a Certified Career Counselor and Certified through EAGALA to provide equine-assisted therapy. 

Dr. Jose Carbajal, LCSW

Dr. Jose Carbajal, a U.S. Army veteran, earned his bachelor’s and master’s degrees in social work and a master’s in theological studies from Baylor University, and a Ph.D. in Social Work from the University of Texas at Arlington. With over 15 years of clinical experience and extensive teaching experience, Jose specializes in trauma, sexual abuse recovery, domestic violence, and substance abuse. His research focuses on trauma interventions, neuroscience, and faith. He is EMDR Certified, an Approved Consultant, and an EMDRIA Approved Trainer, with numerous publications and professional presentations to his name.

Dr. Amanda Martin, LMFT-S, LPC, BCN

Amanda Martin holds a PhD in Family Therapy and is a Licensed Professional Counselor, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist Supervisor, and EMDRIA Approved Consultant. With over 14 years of experience, she specializes in trauma therapy for individuals and families in residential and outpatient settings. Amanda also provides supervision for EMDR certification, EMDR consultants-in-training, and LMFT-Associates. Her mission is to help people find a healthy, joyful, and fulfilling path in life. Her warm, supportive, and interactive counseling style incorporates Symbolic Experiential Therapy, Trauma-Focused Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, EMDR, HeartMath, Animal-Assisted Therapy, Neurofeedback, and Collaborative Problem Solving.

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